So, as much as my body physically desires it, I really don't want to have

sex with anyone right now, bcause I would feel like I'm cheating on

Gillian, and I don't want to do that.  We're not officially a couply (as

far as I know . . . not that I've ever eally been sure).  But what we are

to me is two peopole with a lot of chemisry and a lot of potential;

potential that my heart tells me not to pass by.  I sure don't know how to

take advantage of this potential; we live in different worlds.  And yes,

keeping in touch with her, and continuing to think about her, it does

hurt.  And that does suck.  John seems to think that's a good basis for

dropping the whole thing; he doesn't want to live like that, in a

relationship that causes pain because he cares about someone.  What did

Robin Williams say in GWH?  

"Real pain is when you love someone more than you love yourself."  

Elton John said it first.