I wish I could write down how my nails smell, with this polish on them.

because I thinik this night and that smell are permanently connected,

etched in my brain like a name in stone.



someone, at least one person, told me that "friends that fuck" would never

last, and someone would end up wanting more.  I knew that it would never

be me.  and I was right.  why is that?  am I an unfeeling android?  (whee,

repeat questions.  )



didn't want to hurt your feelings when I asked her out to dinner.  



"Are you asking me out on a date?"

"No."

"Because I've been asked out on dates before, and that's what it sounded

like."



well, we'll see.  

maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me

always the thought, but it hasn't come to fruition yet.



I wonder what you know of me already.  how scared off you already are.

that you're going to dinner with a directionless, neurotic alcoholic on

antidepressants.  how much more could you ask for?





Mother, mother, can you hear me 

Sure I'm sober, sure I'm sane 

Life is perfect, never better 

Still your daughter, still the same 



And if I tell you what you wanna hear 

Will it help you to sleep well at night? 

Are you sure that I'm your perfect dear? 

Now, just cuddle up and sleep tight 



I'm hungry, I'm dirty 

I'm losing my mind, everything's fine 

I'm freezing, I'm starving 

I'm bleeding to death, everything's fine